
The Permission Problem
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The Permission Problem
Why HR Professionals Keep Waiting for Someone Else to Invest in Them
By Reanette Etzler, PHR | The Strategic HR Coach
I planned a personal growth conference for HR professionals. Guest speakers. Practical tools. Real talk about leveling up your career and your influence.
Very few showed up.
The next week, I ran legal training. Every seat was full before I even sent the reminder email.
And here's the thing — I'm not mad. I'm curious. Because that contrast tells me everything I need to know about the relationship HR professionals have with their own growth.
Legal training felt mandatory. Growth felt optional. And that — right there — is the problem.
The Invisible Permission Slip
HR professionals spend their entire careers advocating for other people's development. Performance plans, succession planning, training budgets, learning management systems — you know how to build all of it.
But when it comes to YOUR growth? Suddenly, the timing isn't right. The budget doesn't exist. Something at work came up.
"You cannot build a culture of growth inside an organization if you are personally running on empty."
— Reanette Etzler, The Strategic HR Coach
Dave Ulrich, widely regarded as one of the most influential thinkers in HR, has spent decades making the case that HR must evolve from a support function into a strategic partner. But here's what doesn't get said enough: that evolution starts with the individual HR professional deciding they are worth investing in.
Nobody is handing you that permission slip. You have to write it yourself.
The Legal Training Paradox
Let's be honest about why legal training fills the room and personal growth does not.
Why HR Shows Up for Legal Training:
• There is external accountability attached — a deadline, a requirement, potential liability
• The organization funds it without question
• Missing it has visible, immediate consequences
• It is framed as protecting the company, not developing the individual
Why HR Skips Personal Growth:
• It is self-directed — no one is checking whether you showed up
• The ROI feels abstract and long-term, not immediate
• The organization often does not prioritize it the same way
• It requires investing in YOURSELF, which many HR professionals are not trained to do
The irony? The skills you develop through personal growth — strategic thinking, emotional intelligence, communication, resilience, leadership presence — are the exact skills that make you BETTER at every other part of your job. Including the legal stuff.
But because growth does not come with liability attached, it keeps getting pushed to the back burner. And the back burner eventually burns out.
The ROI Your Boss Actually Understands
Here is the part of this conversation that most HR coaches won't tell you: your boss is not going to invest in your growth until YOU make the business case for it.
That's not cynical. That's just how organizations work. And if anyone knows how to build a business case for human capital investment, it should be the HR professional.
Try this framing the next time you want to request development funding:
"This training/conference/course will help me develop [specific skill]. That skill will directly impact [specific business outcome] by [specific mechanism]. The investment is [cost] and the estimated return is [time saved, turnover reduced, process improved] within [timeframe]."
You are not asking for a favor. You are presenting an investment. There is a difference — and HR professionals need to start making that distinction.
"Before you can talk to your CEO like a business partner, you have to start thinking like one. That includes thinking about your own development as an investment, not an expense."
— Reanette Etzler, The Strategic HR Coach
What Happens When HR Stops Growing
John Maxwell — someone I have had the honor to learn from and work alongside — says it plainly: you will never change your life until you change something you do daily.
In HR, not growing means one very specific thing: you stay transactional.
You stay the person who processes paperwork instead of the person who shapes strategy. You stay reactive instead of becoming proactive. You keep saying "no" because you never developed the tools to find a path to "yes."
The HR Hangover — that bone-deep exhaustion from too much work, systems that don't function, and never feeling seen by leadership — does not go away by working harder. It goes away when you change the approach.
And changing the approach requires growth.
Three Ways to Give Yourself Permission Starting Today
Block one hour per week on your calendar labeled 'Strategic Development.' Treat it like a meeting you cannot cancel. Read. Listen. Learn. Think. This is not optional time — it is operational time for your own professional infrastructure.
Build the business case for your next development investment. Pick one course, conference, coaching program, or certification that would directly impact your strategic capability. Write a two-paragraph pitch to your leadership. You may be surprised by the yes you get when you ask the right way.
Join or create a community of HR professionals who are committed to growth. Isolation is one of the biggest accelerants of the HR Hangover. When you are in community with people who are moving forward, it becomes much harder to stay stuck.
"HR professionals who invest in themselves are not being selfish. They are being strategic. Because a stronger HR professional builds a stronger organization."
— Reanette Etzler, The Strategic HR Coach
Moving from transactional to transformational to stakeholder is not something that happens to you. It is something you decide.
The decision starts with permission. Your permission. For yourself.
So here it is, from me to you: You have permission. Now what are you going to do with it?
The AI for HR Crash Course is now available for download!
Ready to take the next step?
Connect with Reanette at www.thestrategichrcoach.com or 530-520-5775
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